Purpose

Posted on

The Glory in Our Story

Hurry up and wait. That’s the in-between I feel that I’ve lived in since February 18th. 

It’s been a little over 5 months since we lost the little one that lived inside me for 6 weeks. 

6 weeks. That’s all it took to change our lives forever. 

In the 5 months since that day I have walked through every emotion that one human can know. There have been days of deep grief, confusion, and questioning. Others have been filled with hope, peace, and even excitement for the future. 

I recently rewatched our wedding video. That day is full of so many sweet moments and memories! As I watched, my heart ached in a way that it had not before while reminiscing. As we said our vows and promised our lives to each other, there was one line that stuck out to me.

“I, Emily, in the presence of God, take you, Brannon, to be my husband, to love and to follow from this day forward, in good times and bad, when God gives and when He takes away…”

When I repeated those words that day I remember thinking of my mom. When she promised herself to my dad, she had no clue that the day she would have to say goodbye to him would come much sooner than she would have ever dreamed. Saying those words, because of my family’s story, I knew that they carried much weight with them. I recognized that we were not promised long lives, material wealth, and healthy bodies from now until eternity. I had walked through grief and seen God’s goodness in the taking away. Even in that, I did not know what was to come in our story and how difficult it would be to trust God in the taking away in our married life. 

Infertility was something that I always feared, but never actually believed would be something that I would walk through. I had the “that could never happen to me” mentality. When conversations began with my doctor that something might be a little off, my mind went into overdrive. Is it something I’m doing? What about my life needs to change to fix this? What have I done to cause this? 

For almost a year Brannon and I walked through test after test, doctor’s appointment after doctor’s appointment. We did a lot of hurrying to try and get to the root of the issues, but it seemed like a lot more waiting- waiting on test results, waiting to know what next steps were available, waiting to understand what all of this meant. 

I will never forget the feeling that I had when I saw my positive pregnancy test. There was utter disbelief and shock. How could this be? Was this happening? I always wondered what creative way I’d find to tell Brannon that he was going to be a dad. At that moment, all of those ideas flew out the window. I called him immediately and through the phone yelled “you have to go buy me more pregnancy tests! Right now!” To which he responded, “this is really how you are going to tell me this?!” There was no time for thinking! We were completely overjoyed! 

Only 6 weeks in and our baby’s heart stopped beating. Our joy quickly turned to sorrow. 

The Lord gives, the Lord takes away, blessed be the name of the Lord. 

It has been 5 months since then. 5 months of recovering, hurrying to get answers and next steps, and waiting on when we’d see that day come once again when 2 pink lines pop up on a pregnancy test. 

I don’t know how long we will be waiting. I don’t know how many more doctor visits and tests we will have to go through. We have no idea. So we hurry up to do what we can and wait on the Lord. 

I’ve spent a lot of time mulling over what it should be like to share our journey in this. Writing has always been an outlet for me, but this is also a deeply personal topic to many. What I have learned is that it is the story of far more couples than I ever recognized before I walked this road. And even in that, all of our stories look a bit different. Some women have been trying for years, others only a few months. Some couples have multiple babies in heaven, others have several in their arms. Regardless of the path for each family, many of the emotions and struggles are similar. Miscarriage and infertility are challenging and often silent battles. 

Sharing our story is therapeutic to me. The little life that we lost has value. I want to give it the space in our family that it deserves! The road of infertility is lonely, and I want other men and women walking through it to know they are not alone and that in Christ, there is hope. 

The glory in our story is not a baby. Of course, our prayer is that one day we will have the privilege to hold a little one of our own in our arms. We know, however, that is not promised to us. The glory in our story is God. The glory is how He is working gratitude in our hearts when they would naturally lean towards frustration. The glory is the patience we’re given when it would be easier to be impatient. The glory is the new understanding we are gaining in His Word. The glory is the depths of His character we are getting to experience. The glory is how He has united us with other people walking similar roads that can encourage, uplift, and bear our burdens with us. The glory is what He is allowing us to see that we would not have been able to see had we not been standing in the valley. 

His Word is true when it says He uses trials to grow steadfastness within us. One day, we will be perfect, lacking in nothing. That day will be when we meet Jesus face to face, and that is where our true home is (James 1). Our circumstances and experiences are real, but the promises of His Word are what is sure, steady, and trustworthy. They are what exist as our stronghold when the whole earth is shaking beneath our feet. His gospel is the only thing that makes sense of the sufferings of this world. 

In our lives right now we are hurrying to do what we can physically for our bodies to create and sustain life and then waiting to see what comes of it. I pray that more than physically, I am hurrying to read His Word, to fill my mind with His truth, to surround myself with Christian community and allow them to bear these burdens with me, to be present in my local body, to commit myself to prayer, and to graciously love, serve, and submit to my husband. As we do these things, let us wait on the Lord in hope. I know that it is in this place that I learn true dependence on Him. 

He is making all things new! Praise God – our suffering is not wasted. 

Posted on

Just As I Am

“Just as I am, Thou wilt receive
Wilt welcome, pardon, cleanse, relieve
Because Thy promise I believe
O Lamb of God, I come”

Those were the words that played as my Granny breathed her last breath on this earth and opened her eyes to meet her Savior. In just one moment while we held her hands and wiped our tears, her pain was taken away, her worries no longer plagued her mind, her loved ones that had gone on before her were reunited, and her creator welcomed her home. In just one moment, death became life and her faith was made sight. 

My granny was unlike any other. I’m sure many of us could stand on this stage and share memories of her, lessons she taught us, and recipes she shared with us. Just looking across this room is a testament to her life. Granny touched the lives of many. 

Many of my childhood memories take place sitting around her kitchen table. Her home served as an oasis. On our way home from school or practices or wherever we had been we’d end up stopping by if her truck was in the carport or her kitchen light was on. We never knocked, just walked right in. Even though it’s been several years since she lived in that house, I can still remember very vividly the sounds, the sights and the smells of her home. We would sit around her kitchen table talking and snacking on whatever she had in the middle. Typically that was peanut butter crackers and butter cookies. Granny knew what each of our favorite snacks were and she would often have just what we wanted stuck away in her pantry if it wasn’t already sitting out. Even after my brother went to college, granny would still buy him his favorite chocolate covered cookies and try to send them home with him. Oftentimes she had a pot on the stove cooking some kind of soup or dish that she’d always try to offer to us. Needless to say, there was never a lack of food at Granny’s house.  Which wasn’t always a good thing. One funny memory I have of granny is that she didn’t believe in expiration dates. Many times, if you went to pull something out of her fridge, you knew not to take a bite until you checked the date. There were several times I pulled out condiments that were at least 2 years old. Granny wasn’t going to let anything go to waste! 

For those that don’t know me, I am the daughter of Eric and Andrea Tew. After Uncle Merwin died, my dad moved to Alabama from Georgia to live with my Granny, his Aunt Mildred, and help on the farm. What was going to be just a few years, turned into his career. Granny loved my dad as more than just a nephew, as she did all of her nieces and nephews, and instead treated him as one of her own. My mom and dad met several years after my dad moved to town and then spent many of their dating years in my granny’s house. When they married and had children, my sister, brother, and myself were taken in as her own grandchildren. I’ve always joked with people that my family can be a bit confusing. When I first met my husband and tried to explain to him who everyone was, he jokingly told us that we just decided who we wanted people to be and called them that! I always had to explain that granny was my great aunt, but basically my grandmother! I was blessed to not only have my parent’s parents as grandparents but an additional grandmother in granny. 

Granny walked with our family through some extremely trying times. After my dad was diagnosed with cancer, as did many of our family members, granny stepped up to help my mom in any way that she could. I remember when my dad got really sick and spent much of his time in a recliner in our living room, granny would pull up one of our dining room chairs and sit beside him. They always had much to talk about! When he passed away, granny’s presence in our lives only increased. When we had ball games, dance recitals, or majorette performances Granny was always there. She was always quick to tell us how proud she was of us, and we knew that it was more than just words. 

Sitting around her table was one of my favorite things to do. Oftentimes, if we stayed late enough, Uncle Myron or Calin would come in as they closed up shop at the farm for the day. Those nights I would think about what life might be like if my dad were still here. I’d imagine him walking in with them, sitting down in his dirty work clothes, and grabbing whatever food was on the table. Being in and around granny’s house always made me feel a bit closer to my dad. 

Some of the greatest lessons that I ever learned from granny were in this church. She sat in the same pew every single sunday morning. Very few Sundays did she miss and even after she moved into an assisted living, whenever she could get here she did. Granny was a faithful and committed member of her local church body. Many people sitting here today I’m sure once sat under teaching and encouragement in some form. Granny was always in the know. If there was something going on in your life, she knew about it. She would always remember to ask you how you were doing and remind you that she was praying for you. Now as I have grown up and moved off, I often think about my granny’s dedication to her church body. She taught me the importance of church membership through her commitment to this body. She loved Blackwood’s church and the people that filled the pews. She invested her life in this community through her love, her care, her wisdom, and her kindness. 

When I think of the words of Proverbs 31, I think of my granny. 


An excellent wife who can find?
She is far more precious than vjewels.
She wseeks wool and flax,
and works with willing hands.
She xrises while it is yet night
and yprovides food for her household
and portions for her maidens.
She considers a field and buys it;
with the fruit of her hands she plants a vineyard.
She zdresses herself5 with strength
and makes her arms strong.
She perceives that her merchandise is profitable.
Her lamp does not go out at night.
She puts her hands to the distaff,
and her hands hold the spindle.

One thing that you hear of granny’s life most often is what a hard worker she was. I’m somewhat thankful I wasn’t around when she was more involved with the farm work. I’ve heard she didn’t take any excuses! She knew what she had to do to provide for her family and through sweat and tears, she was willing to do just that. She instilled that work ethic into her children. I see it in Uncle Myron in his dedication to the farm. In Ree Ree in the multiple things that she juggles at all times. And I saw it in Uncle Marty in his dedication to one of the things he loved most – piano. Granny was a capable woman and respected by many. Whether inside the home or outside of the home, granny was not afraid to do the work needed. I remember even as she began to age and we all got a bit more worried about her, we’d drive by and she would still be picking up limbs from her yard. You couldn’t stop her! She did all things as unto the Lord. There’s a great deal that we can learn from her in that respect today. 

Strength and dignity are her clothing,
and she laughs at the time to come.
She opens her mouth with wisdom,
and the teaching of kindness is on her tongue.
“Many jwomen have done kexcellently,
but you surpass them all.”
lCharm is deceitful, and beauty is vain,
but a woman who fears the LORD is to be praised.

I am eternally grateful for the Godly example I had in granny. She held a constant, confident faith, no matter what life threw at her. She was full of wisdom. Oftentimes, laying beside the peanut butter crackers on her table, would be an open Bible. She cherished God’s Word and committed herself to studying and obeying it. She was a woman who feared the Lord. She humbly gave of herself, her time, her money, and her talents. 

When we were standing around granny’s bed the night she died, though there was sadness, there was peace. Yes, there was mourning, but also there was joy.

I will miss my granny terribly. The normal practices of my life will feel different. I no longer have her to call when I’m driving home from work and won’t be able to sit with her and talk when I come home for a visit. For that, I mourn. I mourn our loss of her, but I rejoice in where she is. 

I can share for hours about what granny meant to me, how she loved my family, and how greatly we will miss her. But I think I would be doing her life a disservice if I didn’t share with you the person that she placed her trust in. Granny would not want us to continue on in sadness when we think of her life. No, we get to celebrate her life knowing exactly where she is today and that, if in Christ, we will one day be reunited with her. 

Ephesians 2

And you were kdead in the trespasses and sins 2 lin which you once walked, following the course of this world, following mthe prince of the power of the air, the spirit that is now at work in nthe sons of disobedience— 3 among whom we all once lived in othe passions of our flesh, carrying out the desires of the body1 and the mind, and pwere by nature qchildren of wrath, like the rest of mankind.2 4 But3 God, being rrich in mercy, sbecause of the great love with which he loved us, 5 even twhen we were dead in our trespasses, umade us alive together with Christ—vby grace you have been saved— 6 and raised us up with him and wseated us with him in the heavenly places in Christ Jesus, 7 so that in the coming ages he might show the immeasurable xriches of his grace in ykindness toward us in Christ Jesus. 8 For zby grace you have been saved athrough faith. 

We can have peace knowing that granny is in heaven today because of a man named Jesus. The truth is this – God is the loving King, creator of all things, and the holy judge. He created a world, perfect and complete. He filled the earth with animals and fish and vegetation. He called the world “good”. He then crafted his most treasured creation – man. Genesis 1:27 says, “So God created man in his own image, in the image of God he created him; male and female he created them.” 

Men and women were uniquely created by God. In Psalm 139 we are told that our inward beings were crafted by him, fearfully and wonderfully made. Yet, man rebelled against God. Eve, when tempted by the serpent, asked the question “did God really say?” Did God really say that we aren’t to eat of the fruit that he specifically forbade? Instead of following in her maker’s design, she chose to doubt him and eat of the fruit. At that moment, sin entered into the world. Sin is a great offense to God and it separated all mankind from Him. Romans 6:23 tells us that the wages of sin is death. This sin spread to all mankind. No one is immune. We all choose our own way instead of choosing to walk with our creator. Romans 3:23 says that no one is righteous, no, not one. 

But God, in His great love, sent His son Jesus. Sin had created a gap too wide for anyone to close between man and God. Jesus came, born of a virgin, fully man and fully God,  and lived a perfect, sinless and powerful life to die a sacrificial and substitutionary death. For us to have a restored relationship with God, a sacrifice for our sin had to be made. Christ knew no sin, yet he stood in our place. He willingly gave himself up to be crucified. On the cross Christ took on our sin and died the death that we deserved. He was our sacrifice and our substitute! 

Praise God, the story doesn’t end there! 3 days later He rose from the grave victorious over sin, Satan and death. God calls all people in all nations to repent and believe in Jesus for the forgiveness of sins, turning from all idols to declare allegiance to Jesus alone as King and trusting in Jesus alone as Lord of one’s life.

Granny had given her life to Christ. She had recognized her sin and depravity apart from Him. She confessed her sin, believed that Christ was Lord, and gave her life to Him. By grace, through faith, Granny had a restored relationship with her creator. 

If you are a follower of Christ, what does this mean for you? This means that, though this earthly death causes us heartache because we loved her dearly, we can rejoice. Why? Because the instant that Granny took her last breath on this earth, she took her first breath in her eternal home. The Bible tells us that, as believers, we are just pilgrims passing through. Our lives here are but a vapor. 93 years definitely does not seem like a vapor, but compared to the eternity that Granny will spend with Christ in heaven, it is.

Grief can be incredibly difficult to walk through. But in Christ, and only in Christ, we can remember the promises of the news of Christ, and we can have joy! The night granny died, tears streamed down my face. But in the same moment I wanted to shout for joy. The cause that she committed her life to was finally being made whole. Granny had given her life, walked daily in the process of sanctification, growing to be more like Christ, and now stood before her maker glorified and whole. We can grieve our loss here on earth of our friend, sister, mother, grandmother, and aunt, but we can do so with joy and in hope. 

As we grieve, we can know that God is with us in the midst of our trial. His Word tells us that He is working all things together for good. We know that trials, suffering, and death on this earth exist because we live in a broken world where nothing is untouched by the effects of sin. But now no dementia plagues Granny’s mind. She is speaking clearly. Her knees no longer hurt her. She is running, jumping and dancing in the presence of her savior. No cancer affects her organs, her body is redeemed. She is reunited with her husband, her son and daughter, her parents, many members of her family, friends gone before her, my dad, and my little baby that I never got to hold in my arms. 

Christian, rejoice! Granny is home with her Savior! One day we will see her again. 

If you do not know Christ, let today be the day of salvation. You too can have hope in the midst of suffering and grief. Christ is calling you to himself. 

I won’t adjust to this new reality anytime soon. I continue to play the saved voicemails on my phone from granny… listening over and over to how she always left the I out of my name when she said “Hey Emly!” Granny will be missed by many. I can’t really imagine our lives here without her. But I can rest knowing that one day, I’ll be with her again, united with my Savior. Her life is a testimony of faith, of love, of sacrifice, and hard work. How generous is God to have allowed me to know her and to be loved by her. Her legacy will not soon fade but will live on in all the lives of those that she touched in her 93 years on this earth.

1 Corinthians 13:12 
For now we see in a mirror dimly, but then face to face. Now I know in part; then I shall know fully, even as I have been fully known.  

Granny has now seen face to face. She knows fully. She is home.

Posted on

Make My Heart Believe

As I sit and attempt to write the words of my heart, I twist the ring that sits on my right hand. It’s a gold band with a simple design across the top: opal stones. Opal is the birthstone for the month of October. This was already a special month to me including both my husband and my dad’s birthday. Now it is also the month of something else very dear to me – the month the baby I’ll never get to hold was due. 

I’ve walked through grief before. I’ve known the aching of wishing so badly for someone that you once had physically present that’s no longer there. For the last month I’ve faced a grief that I’ve yet to be able to fully put words to. It’s similar to the grief of losing a loved one, but only without ever having ever seen that person face to face, yet feeling as if you knew them profoundly.  

When my husband and I found out we were pregnant I was incredibly overjoyed. When we saw the word “pregnant” blink across the screen of the pregnancy test our lives instantly changed. It’s nearly impossible to keep yourself from immediately considering all the fun things ahead! We started discussing names, how I wanted to decorate the nursery, and if we thought it would be a boy or girl. Though my stomach hadn’t grown an inch, I’d still place my hand there often thinking to myself “my baby is in there! The Lord is literally working out Psalm 139 inside of me right now!” It was the most beautiful and the most terrifying few weeks of my life. 

With all of the feelings of anticipation, there was also great worry. I often wrote in my journal of the fear of not having enough faith to face the pain that would come if something were to go awry with the pregnancy. Though we rarely have much control over anything in our lives, being pregnant ripped from me any feeling of control. This little life was in the Lord’s hands. I had no idea how God would hold me, comfort me, and strengthen me in truth in the coming days. 

After losing our baby, I sat in the words of Psalm 42 often. 

Psalm 42:11

Why are you cast down, O my soul,
and why are you in turmoil within me?
Hope in God; for I shall again praise him,
my salvation and my God.

Do you ever feel as if you know something in your mind, but don’t believe it in your heart? 

As I grieve the loss of this pregnancy, I know with my mind that God is present with us in grief (Deuteronomy 31:6). I read in His Word that He is working all things together for good (Romans 8:28). I know that trials come in our lives because we live in a broken world, where nothing is untouched by the effects of sin. Scripture tells us in Romans 8 that even creation groans as it waits for the day for Christ to come and make all things new. I know that my God will bring about growth from my suffering (James 1). 

Yet in the throngs of grief, when I am at my worst, my heart fights to believe those truths. The pain can seem unbearable. The dreams I had for my family seem shattered into a million pieces and I don’t know how to piece them back together. All I can manage to believe with my heart in those moments is that the tear stained onesie I’m clutching and the gaping hole in my heart is wrecked with pain. A pain I’ve never felt before. 

I found myself sitting at home in the midst of a moment of deep sadness. Tears streamed down and fell upon the open Bible in front of me. I know that in Him is my hope, but I felt so unable to find anything to speak life back into my weary bones. I flipped to the pages of Psalm 42 and began to read through a trembling voice.

In this Psalm David is in a fight with himself. He knows that God is His only hope and he yells at his own soul, “Hope in God! Why aren’t you getting this? Why are you in turmoil? He is our hope!” 

That internal battle is one that I’m sure many of us have faced, whether it’s caused by grief or something else. The distance between our head and our heart can seem so far when the weight of the world is crushing down. 

If we only ever lived our lives based on our feelings, not much would ever be accomplished. Our feelings are wrapped up in situations and are as fleeting as the waves that toss in the sea – they come and go in every direction. We must choose to walk in truth and obedience regardless of our feelings, knowing that God is much more concrete than our ever changing emotions. 

The words of this Psalm remind me of the words of Mark 9:24, “I believe; help my unbelief.” When I know who God is, I know He is working, and I know He is with me, yet I am only barely grasping to believe that in the pit of grief I find myself speaking the words, “God, I believe! Make my heart believe!”

Isaiah 40:31

“But they who wait for the Lord shall renew their strength; they shall mount up with wings like eagles; they shall run and not be weary; they shall and not faint.”

Our days are not promised to be brighter tomorrow as long as we are earth side. But, as believers, we do have the lasting, steady, eternal hope of Christ and the supplied grace and strength through the Holy Spirit to help us face each moment as they come. He has not left us and He will not forsake us. He is faithful, sure, and an anchor for our souls through the raging seas of grief and life’s toughest battles. 

Posted on

Tightly Gripped Church Pews

For many years my feet have stood planted on the same hardwood floors, hands firmly grasped on the wooden back of the pew in front of me. Some Sundays met with swaying and smiles, others with tears, heartache, and questions. In that same space, on the same row in the same small country church, my faith has flourished, my faith has been challenged, my faith has struggled, my faith has grown. 

The term “since before you were born” rings no truer than when talking about my upbringing in the church. It was where my parents brought me as an infant and dedicated me to the Lord, where I ran after children’s church to my dad’s lap, where I snuck naps and snacks hiding in the pew when I was too young to pay attention to the sermon. Those pews were the ones that held my family when my dad got sick, when his cancer worsened, and where we said our final goodbye to him. That same wooden floor is where I stood as a middle schooler questioning what it meant to be a Christian, as a high schooler trying to figure out how to live in the world but not of it, and even as a college student when I was maturing in my understanding of the beauty of Scripture and being a disciple of Christ. 

The foundations of my faith were shaped within those wooden walls. The trials, the heartache, the seasons of joy, the wrestling against the big questions of life were dealt with in those pews and at that altar. That same church pew has been a space that my life has existed for its entirety. 

I stood in that same place this past weekend. I don’t get to visit quite as often as I used to, but every time I do I leave incredibly grateful. As I stood in my normal spot next to my family, I looked down at my hands placed where they have fallen many times before. I noted the scratches and scuffs in the wood around them and wondered how many were put there by me. What stories I bet they could tell. 

There is no power in that church pew. Nothing miraculous about those wooden floors where my heels dig in. But in that place is where the Lord has met me time and time again. This weekend I couldn’t help but recall His faithfulness to me. From the little girl running to her father’s arms to the now-married woman learning daily to rely on the Heavenly Father. 

In our youth group at the church my husband and I attend in Montgomery we’ve been talking a lot about testimonies. Many of the students in our youth group have similar stories as mine. Most of them have also been raised in a local church from the time they were young. We talked with them about how several of them feel that do not have much of a story to tell. Standing in that church pew on Co Rd 44 this weekend reminded me of mine. 

If you’ve been around church your whole life it’s easy to go along with the motions of things. There are some dangerous places those motions will take you if you’re not careful:

1 – You can live your whole life assuming there is some kind of saving power in a church building. You can miss the Gospel and assume “salavation by relation”. Sister or brother – repent and believe. Going to church cannot save you anymore than going in the ocean makes you a fish! (Sounds silly – but it’s true!) No amount of church services you attend can take away your sins. In Christ alone can you know true hope. 

2 – You can be puffed up in pride and not even realize it. A sin I struggled with (read: STRUGGLE with) is pride. I’ve been taught the Bible since the time I was born. It’s easy to think that this earns you some kind of “christian merit” and walk around like you can do no wrong, casting judgement to all those who struggle outwardly with sin. Brother and sister – check your heart. Ask the Lord to humble you and show you your sin. You must rely on Him as your Savior no matter how many Bible verses you can quote. 

3 – You can become numb to the true message of the Gospel. The Gospel of Jesus Christ is that we were dead in our trespasses and sins – all fall short of the glory of God. Whether you’ve got a permanent spot in a church pew or not, you were wretched in sin without Christ. Your sin was serious. It completely alianted you from Christ. It’s easy to assume that because by the standards of the world you aren’t “that bad” that God sees you the same way. Hardly. Sin brings death and God cannot be associated with it. Even if you realized your need for a Saviour at a young age – you DO have a testimony! The Lord saved you from the miry pit, redeemed you, called you His own and gave you the promise of eternal life. Everyday since He has been sanctifying you through the Holy Spirit. That is an incredibly powerful story to tell. Brother and sister – don’t fall numb to the power of the Gospel. 

I praise God for that front left pew in Blackwood Church where the Lord saved me. What an incredible gift of grace that I get to know Him as my Father. Don’t forget to remember your story and rejoice in the gift of salvation – no matter where you stood before you knew Christ. 

Posted on

Am I Faithful without a Following?

We live in a digital world where almost everyone has an online presence. The online world simultaneously exists alongside “real” life. Social media has given way for people of all kinds with all sorts of stories to rise to fame with thousands of followers leaning in to listen to what they have to say and share. It’s not only celebrities who exist as elites with large followings, but those that know how to work the algorithm, curate entertaining or educational content, and engage with a present audience.

For my entire life, I’ve always felt the draw to share the things on my heart with others. Out of that desire came my blog. As a middle schooler, I decided to go beyond the pages of my journal and begin writing online. My readers consisted of my mom and a few family friends, but that didn’t matter much to me. Writing felt like the outlet to share outwardly what the Lord was doing inwardly. 

My writing has continued, though a bit less frequently than when I was younger. The desires of my heart have not changed, however. When I read something in scripture and the Lord begins to sanctify me in truth I have a natural inclination to share that through words. Many times my husband gets the brunt of it, but in our social media society, sometimes I pick up my phone and share it with friends and family that follow me online, too. I enjoy teaching others about what I am being taught. While I don’t pretend to be the most skilled, I do feel that the Lord has given me at least some gifting in speaking and it brings me great joy to do so. 

Recently I’ve been in a bit of a hard place. As my husband and I sat at one of our favorite local Mexican restaurants just recently I shared with him the struggle that’s been waging within my soul. Through high school and college, I felt that I had so much purpose. I was involved in organizations that I was passionate about, I held leadership positions that gave me a reason to work hard, and I felt that the ways that I was serving and working were meaningful. Since graduating, I’ve struggled to feel that same sense of purpose. 

You don’t have to scroll long online until you’ll come across those “influencers” with thousands of followers that hang on their every word. I’ve easily allowed a social media-focused world to become the gauge of my “success” in life. The industry I work in constantly is measuring client’s goals based on the achievement of increased followers, increased engagement, and increased sales. Because of the desires of my heart and the society that gives anyone a voice, I’ve wrongly assumed that I must be called to share online and see growth in my platform.   

I always wanted to be the girl with a big voice. In this new season of life, I’ve struggled to know how to use that voice as I did in high school and college. I’ve been easily discouraged trying to weed through what my passions, desires, talents, and giftings are and then in turn knowing how to use those in my career and personal life for the furthering of the Kingdom. The world seems to be screaming at me, “well what does your online presence say about you?” 

I don’t have that large of a following besides those I personally know. Nobody subscribes to my blog that I’m aware of. I don’t consistently post and I don’t intentionally engage with my audience regularly. I am in no sense a graphic designer and cannot for the life of me figure out how to create the perfect Instagram color scheme. So, by the same measures that I use to examine my own clients at work, I’m not doing too hot in the social media world. 

Social media culture has taught us that in order to be deemed successful, you must have a significant following. I would guess I’m not the only one that has bought into that lie. 

The Lord has not called us to grow a large audience in order to be deemed faithful. He might bless some with a platform of some significant size to share with others but never has that been the intended goal. Our calling instead is to faithfully follow right where we are, no matter who is or who isn’t watching. 

Will I be faithful in following the Lord even if the task before me is to serve and walk obediently behind a closed door where few might ever see? Will I surrender my gifts, my talents, my skills, and my passions to the Lord and say, “Father, use them as you see fit. It’s about you, it is not about me.” Online culture has caused us to think that the vessel of the truth is far more important than the truth itself. While we will be used by Him and for Him, we are not the prize – He is. 

Sister, social media is not the judge of your faithfulness. I am in the middle of this learning season, trying to figure out how to walk in my passions and skills. One thing I’m taking away is that while social media is a gift that we can use and should use for His glory, it has very little to do with measuring our true faithfulness in following Christ. 

Will I obey Him, serve Him and speak of Him even if nobody is listening? Will I be faithful even without a following? These are the questions I’m pondering within my soul. 

Posted on

Imperishable

One of the most frustrating things is when you get something brand new that you are so excited about, only to have it ruined after only a short time of having it. 

You get home with a new shirt that you can’t wait to wear! It only takes an hour of having it on before your lunch for the day misses your mouth and food goes tumbling down the front. No stain remover is perfect, and some stains just won’t come out. 

Or, you buy a new piece of decor for your house. You get it set up just like you like it. After a few days, you accidentally bump into the counter knocking it over and before long, your beautiful new decorative piece is shattered on the floor. 

These frustrating feelings can go beyond just material things, too. You had plans that suddenly fell through, the job you wanted so bad didn’t work out as you wanted it to, or you didn’t score as good as you hoped on the test you studied so hard for. 

Even more serious, you lose a loved one far sooner than you expected. A friend moves away and you feel lonely. Or, you come down with an illness that will severely inhibit your way of life. 

We easily get frustrated about these mishaps in life. Some rightly so, others just due to our selfishness and pride. However, I think there’s a lesson to learn in that place of disappointment. 

I’ve just begun reading through 1 Peter. The first chapter of this book uses some very strong language that stuck out to me as I skimmed the verses. 

Living. 

Imperishable. 

Undefiled. 

Unfading. 

Kept. 

Guarded. 

Abiding. 

Remains. 

Forever. 

These words are all related in one big way – they describe something that is sure and steady. In contrast to the things that I listed above, whatever these words are describing can’t be ruined, taken away, or lost. 

So, what are they talking about? 

Blessed be the God and Father of our Lord Jesus Christ! According to his great mercy, he has caused us to be born again to a living hope through the resurrection of Jesus Christ from the dead, to an inheritance that is imperishable, undefiled, and unfading, kept in heaven for you, who by God’s power are being guarded through faith for a salvation ready to be revealed in the last time. 

1 Peter 1:3-5

In Christ, we are born again to a LIVING hope and an inheritance that cannot be destroyed. In a world that is constantly trying to get our attention and begs us to put our hope in anything but God, these verses remind us that nothing on this earth will ever be worth placing our hope and confidence in apart from Christ. 

The new clothes we buy will eventually wear out. The houses we build and fill with pretty things will eventually get dirty and fall apart. Friendships, plans, and careers will at some point disappoint us. Wealth will be spent, health will be challenged. Why do we so easily throw ourselves toward these things, expecting to find real life? 

Hear me on this, it isn’t wrong to desire nice things, a home you enjoy filling, friendships that last, a career you love, or the health of you and your family. However, we must take this perspective – even those things can’t satisfy our hearts apart from Christ. We must be careful to not search in this world for what only God can give. 

A few verses down in 1 Peter 1:23-25 the words of Isaiah 40 are repeated: 

Since you have been born again not of perishable seed, but of imperishable, through the living and abiding word of God; for
“All flesh is like grass 
And all its glory like the flower of grass.
The grass withers,
And the flower falls,
But the word of the Lord remains forever.”

What a glorious hope that is! In Christ, we do not have to fear the loss of material goods. When we know Christ as our Savior, we are sealed by the Holy Spirit into something that is imperishable, completely undefiled, and unfading. Even as we face losses, challenges, and trials of this world, which we will, we can have confidence in our eternity with Christ that is a living hope. 

It will never go away, it will never be thwarted. 

Our lives, as verse 24-25 remind us, are like the grass – fading and withering. But the one thing that remains is the Word of God and His promises. 

What are we clinging to? The perishable or the imperishable?

Take hold of the living hope of Jesus Christ and find true rest and life for your souls. 

Do not lay up for yourselves treasures on earth, where moth and rust destroy and where thieves break in and steal, but lay up for yourselves treasures in heaven, where neither moth nor rust destroys and where thieves do not break in and steal. 

Matthew 6:19-20

If then you have been raised with Christ, seek the things that are above, where Christ is, seated at the right hand of God. Set your minds on things that are above, not on things that are on earth. For you have died, and your life is hidden with Christ in God.  When Christ who is your life appears, then you also will appear with him in glory.

Colossians 3:1-3
Posted on

You’re Not Off the Hook

I marveled at the thought of overseas missions as a young Christian. Surely that’s what God was calling me to, right? There would be no way my life would have any value if not lived across the world taking the Gospel to those unreached. Now, several years later, I still have those desires deep within my soul, but I’ve learned a lot more about my calling since then. 

As believers, the Great Commission is not limited to only a few – 

Go therefore and make disciples of all nations, baptizing them in the name of the Father and of the Son and of the Holy Spirit, teaching them to observe all that I have commanded you. And behold, I am with you always, to the end of the age

Matthew 28:19-20

If I would have been asked the question as a freshman in high school “what do you want to do after college?” I would’ve answered probably pretty confidently – some form of ministry. It’s not that my answer at this point in my life has changed, but I see “ministry” differently than I did as a 15-year-old.

After graduating from college and getting married my husband and I settled into a new home in a new city with new jobs. It felt normal – what everyone does. As a Christian, however, it’s not just “normal.” 

We have a calling 

I have no idea where the Lord will lead Brannon and me over the seasons of our lives. I do hope to one day serve in full-time ministry or in missions, but I’m learning that no matter my vocation there is already a very radical call on my life. 

We are called to make disciples wherever we are, whatever we are doing. If I’m ever unsure of God’s will for my life – I can turn to the command of Matthew 28. 

As a high schooler, I assumed that this calling lived out looked bold and beautiful. What I never considered was how to live obediently to that command even in the mundane. 

I live in Montgomery, Alabama – not anywhere overly exciting (though I do think it’s pretty great!) 

Is my calling null and void just because it’s close to home? Hardly. 

Live Obediently 

Some are called to leave the comfort of their country to serve the Lord in new places, and maybe that is your calling. But those callings aren’t “better” than the ones that lead us to somewhere nearby – they are equally as important, but oftentimes ignored. 

The need for the Gospel isn’t based on your geographic location. Right where you are there are people that need to be shown the love of Christ. How will you do that?

Over the past year, we have tried to be very intentional about not becoming complacent where we are at. It’s HARD and please hear me when I say that we have conquered nothing – we have SO much to learn. However, with the command that we have on our lives, we want to live radically no matter where we are. We are still discovering exactly what that looks like for us, but here are a few things we’ve tried to practice: 

  1. Join and ACTIVELY participate in a local church body 
  2. Be intentional about your time 
  3. Seek out those around you 
  4. Make yourself available 
  5. Use your talents and gifts to serve
  6. If you’re not going, send
  7. Prioritize time in the Word 
  8. Pray for the lost 

I can go down the list and tell you how we’ve failed at each of these things, but it is our desire to honor and glorify Christ in these ways. 

You’re Not Off the Hook 

I lived a large part of my life thinking, “well when I’m this age / in this stage / in this place then I can really serve God with my life.” The truth is that I am called to serve Him exactly where my feet are planted. 

I’ve come to realize that one of the hardest ministries for me, personally, is in a place and around people that I am most comfortable with. But that is exactly where we must start living radically for the Gospel. 

No matter your age, your marital status, or your job – you’re not off the hook. You are called to love God and love others. How are you walking in obedience to that calling? 

Take the Next Step 

I have always struggled with trying to figure out God’s plans for my life – trying to see what’s around the corner. Sometimes, those plans aren’t for us to know. We are called to honor him with just the next step. 

An analogy I heard recently explained this well. When you’re hiking a mountain, you’re eyes follow the ground to make sure you don’t trip over any limbs or rocks. However, every few minutes, you glance up to see what’s up ahead. A lot of times our lives might look exactly like this. It’s not bad to plan and dream for the future, taking those glances to see what’s to come, but don’t forget to also put energy into making sure you’re doing well right where your foot is standing currently. 

My husband and I both have a desire to serve the Lord through missions and ministry, and maybe one day that will look like selling all we have and moving to a new place with new people. But right now, we are called to serve the community we are in, work well at the jobs we’ve been given, and walk faithfully with a local church while supporting those who are called to go in this season. 

We’re not off the hook – and neither are you. 

Posted on

Why do bad things happen to “good” people?

One of my favorite quotes by R.C. Sproul Jr. says this, 

“Why do bad things happen to good people? That only happened once and He volunteered.”

R.C Sproul Jr

This question is one that frustrates the minds of many – why do bad things happen to good people? We have all faced trials and sufferings of different kinds. Losing loved ones, facing sickness, financial struggles, natural disasters, and more have disrupted the lives of people across our world from the beginning of time. I’m sure there have been times where you too have begged the question, “why?”

You’re not alone in that wondering. In my lifetime I’ve faced several challenges that have caused me to question and doubt the goodness of God. At only 5 years old I watched my dad battle against cancer raging through his body, and eventually succumb to the disease. We lost my grandfather and a family friend during my middle school years. My grandmothers have all faced serious health challenges that threatened their lives. My uncle died suddenly in the night. And just recently we got an unwanted breast cancer diagnosis for my mom. 

Some might say that I have the right to ask those “why” questions, and while it’s definitely our natural inclination to do so, I’ve learned that those aren’t the questions that we should be asking. 

In my 22 years of life, I’ve thought a lot about suffering on this side of heaven, what its purpose is, and why we endure it. Though I don’t pretend to know all of the answers, I do know the hope that I have in Christ that’s guided me through life’s toughest battles.

I don’t believe we will always know all the answers however, I do think there are truths that we can cling to when we face trials of various kinds. 

No one is good: 

Romans 3:10-12  
“None is righteous, no, not one; no one understands; no one seeks for God. All have turned aside; together they have become worthless; no one does good, not even one.”

Ephesians 2:1-3 
“And you were dead in your trespasses and sins, in which you formerly walked according to the course of this world, according to the prince of the power of the air, of the spirit that is now working in the sons of disobedience. Among them we too all formerly lived in the lusts of our flesh, indulging the desires of the flesh and of the mind, and were by nature children of wrath, even as the rest.”

God is the standard of goodness and we have all gravely missed the mark. Due to our sin, we are separated from Christ, damned, and wretched. 

These verses are hard to swallow, but when we come to terms with our complete lack of goodness we can see more clearly his absolute goodness. When we understand that we are not good and unable to become good in our own strength, we are left searching for some type of hope. That hope is only found through Christ. 

There is purpose in suffering:

James 1:2-4
Count it all joy, my brothers, when you meet trials of various kinds, for you know that the testing of your faith produces steadfastness. And let steadfastness have its full effect, that you may be perfect and complete, lacking in nothing.

The Lord has made it clear in scripture that when (not if) we meet trials and sufferings that He is working within us. 

God uses suffering to open our eyes to where our treasure truly lies. If we treasure the health and wealth of this world, trials and tribulations will shake us to our core. If our treasure is in Christ, His promises and His eternal Kingdom, even life’s roughest storms will not move us. 

Suffering allows us to know God more. Had it not been for the dark days that my family walked through in losing my dad to cancer, I am not sure I would know the Lord today. He used those times in my life to show me my incredible need for Him. Through long nights of tears and questioning, I learned of His kindness, His faithfulness, His character, and His goodness.

Suffering refines us, leading us towards righteousness. Refining won’t always feel good at the moment, but what it is making is beautiful and worth it. 

We have a reason to rejoice:  

One of my dad’s favorite passages was 1 Thessalonians 5:16-18: 

Rejoice always, pray without ceasing, give thanks in all circumstances; for this is the will of God in Christ Jesus for you. 

In the years after we lost my dad, I would read over these verses and furrow my brow – rejoice? The will of God is for me to rejoice when I feel that I lost my dad too soon? And these are the words my dad clung to in facing death? 

His soul found rest in these verses because he knew that he had hope in Christ, outside of this world, that could not be touched or altered by sufferings in this lifetime. There is always a reason to rejoice in that. 

This hope is not found in healed diseases, financial peace, or calmed storms. This hope comes from the life, death, and resurrection of Jesus Christ. 

As I said earlier – no one is good. In our sinfulness, we were separated from Christ. We have no hope. But God sent his son into this world for us. He stepped down out of heaven, walked around on the dust of the earth, never sinning and living a perfectly holy life. Yet, he was led to the cross. Upon him, our sins were placed. The Father looked away, and Jesus breathed His last. 

Three days later, the true breath of life filled His lungs and He walked out of the grave – defeating death and sin. 

He is where our hope lies. Jesus made a way, despite our lack of goodness, for us to know Him and walk in relationship with Him. When we know Him as our Savior and He becomes the Lord of our life, we are promised far more than a perfectly healthy body and ease of days – we are promised eternity with Him. 

That is why even when we face suffering of many kinds, we can and should rejoice. Praise God, this world and these bodies are not our home. 

So why do bad things happen to good people? Well, as R.C Sproul Jr. said, that only happened once – and He volunteered. Christ volunteered to stand in our place, as the only one in all of humanity that was good, to receive a bad, but just, punishment for our sins. And now, He calls us to himself – to repent, follow Him and make disciples of all nations. 

So even in the face of sufferings in this life – losing my dad, other loved ones, and now facing my mom’s cancer diagnosis – I will hope in Christ, rejoice in His promises, and cling to His faithfulness. 

Posted on

The Fight for Unity

It is the eve of November 3rd. I’ve thought many times about what life will look like once the next president has taken office. Whether it be your personal choice or not, one of the candidates will be the 46th president of the United States. 

The last year has been a tough one for most. COVID-19 has caused so many to face unexpected health and financial trials. Unrest runs rampant in our streets. Many fear what is to come. 

I’ve only ever voted in one election. Though I’ve been alive for several others, it seems that this one is different. You have heard it says, “this is the most important election ever” and while I don’t disagree that this one is important, it’s not the level of importance that feels so different to me. 

Disunity has taken root in the lives of many, and christians are not exempt from that. Sadly, I don’t think we have done that great of a job of preventing it much at all. 

So, as voting polls close and all ballots are cast and Biden or Trump take the office, what will happen? What will November 4th mean for us? 

As I have personally tried to weigh the decision I will make on November 3rd, my heart has really broken to see how many brothers and sisters have split over differing opinions. I understand that there are some pretty weighty things at stake this election – ones that should not be overlooked. But, as followers of Christ, how should we respond to differences of opinions? 

After the election is over and there is a president, will unity in the church return? Will brothers and sisters come together under their common faith no matter the president? I’m worried, instead, that satan will continue to stir disunity in our congregations. 

So, how should we combat this? Here are a few things that I think christians should be reminded of:  

Our Calling Has Not Changed: 

No matter the president, God is still sovereign. He has not stepped down off of the throne. There won’t be chaos in Heaven trying to decide what moves to take because they weren’t expecting the outcome. God has not changed. His promises have not changed. Our calling has not and will not change. 

As believers, our sole purpose on this earth is to bring glory to Christ in all that we do. Simply put, we are called to know Him and make Him known. That won’t be any different whether Biden or Trump holds the title of “president.”

Knowing this truth, that our calling as followers of Christ hasn’t shifted, should we not rally around the Gospel and seek to tell the lost about Christ even more? 

Now more than ever we have seen how futile this world that we live in is. The Gospel, not policies and laws, is the hope of this world. No matter the president and no matter the state of our country – THIS is our calling, to go into all the world and make disciples. (Matthew 28:20)

The government doesn’t have the same calling that we do as christians. We have to be willing to get a little dirty and love those around us. That’s been our purpose from the beginning and it still will be after this election, and for all the ones to come. He makes it pretty clear that we are to love Him and love others – so let’s do that. 

His Word is True: 

We know that there are absolutes in Scripture that tell us, as christians, very clearly how we are to walk out our faith. But there are also issues that aren’t clearly stated in Scripture. As brothers and sisters I am sure we have all come to ideas that we differ on. Predestination? Post or pre millennialism? The list could go on. 

So, in our politics, there are bound to be differences in how we view things. While I wholeheartedly believe there are issues that do very clearly have a structure in Scripture, some do not. I really appreciate the way it was explained by two pastors in a podcast I listened to recently with the idea of whole church issues vs not whole church issues. 

Basically, there are things that very much are stated in scripture that christians should agree on. Those are whole church issues. Other issues that are a little less clear are ones that christians can vary on. It’s important to know the difference between the two.

The point is this: as christians, we are to hold Scripture up against our lives, our beliefs, our political leanings and all else. As brothers and sisters in Christ we should be able to encourage each other to do this. If we fall on different sides of a few issues we can ask ourselves – is this something scripture clearly states or not? Can we be unified in Christ with these differences? 

The more important question is probably this – are we treasuring Christ’s Word as the supreme guide of all aspects of our lives? If we are believers we can’t draw lines around the parts of our lives we want the Word to impact and which ones it’s not allowed to touch. We must believe that above all else, His Word is true. 

He is Still on the Throne

I mentioned this earlier, but I think it’s a vital point to end on. 

I’ve heard some people say that they are so fearful of what’s to come if America goes one way or the other on this election. While I, too, have some concerns about what our lives will look like if this or that takes place, I must realize that no matter what happens God is still sovereign. 

I often consider the Old Testament times in the Bible and what the people of those days faced. Think of the Israelties in Egypt. We very clearly see their struggle to trust that God was going to do what He had promised. We have way more reason to trust God now than they did, and yet we still doubt. 

We can rest assured in this truth – God is King. The Psalms repeat it over and over that the world is His, and all that is in it is under His control. We can find so much comfort in this truth, while also walking out in boldness because we know that this world is not our home. We are only pilgrims passing through. 

So, when the election is over and the next president takes office, no matter who it is, let’s fight for unity among christians. We were never promised that life on this earth will be easy. American christians know very little about persecution. I’m not at all wishing for persecution to come, but Scripture is pretty clear that we will face it. If it comes to us through the means of a president and corrupt policies, why should we be surprised? 

No matter the outcome, our calling has not changed, His Word is still true, and He is still on the throne. So, go vote on November 3rd. It is extremely important. We should steward our citizenship well and honor Christ by exercising our right to vote. But come home and find peace in the fact that the outcome of the 2020 election does not determine your eternity – Christ does. 

Buckle down, brothers and sisters. Now is the time to dig in and know Christ more than ever. We are His ambassadors on this earth. During this season, how well will we represent Him in our calling to unity around the Gospel? 

Posted on

A New Perspective

When my dad passed away in 2003 I was only 5 years old, with very little capacity to fully comprehend the weight of what my family was walking through. Instead, mourning him looked different through the ever-changing seasons of my life and gave me a new perspective. 

As a five year old I longed for my daddy to tuck me in, read our nightly Bible stories and to chase my siblings and me through the house.

In middle school I began to see for the first time the differences in dynamics between my family and most others, and wished for mine to just be normal.

My high school years brought lots of tears with realizations that major milestones in my life, like prom and graduation, would always feel a bit empty without my dad present.

College brought new struggles, wishing for the advice and guidance of a dad in my life during so many decisions and transitions.

And in the new season that I’m currently walking through, marriage, young adulthood and beginning a career, I’m experiencing even more new struggles in missing my dad.  

Though there has always been a gap in our family without my dad being there, my mom is a wonderful woman and did all that she could to make our lives feel normal. I never felt that we went without, even though there was only one of her. She did her absolute best to be both mom and dad to us.

Until just recently, I haven’t considered her side of the stages of mourning. Though there were many nights we all hugged each other and wiped tears away, my mom was strong, resilient, and did what she had to do to raise us. She always was quick to comfort us, while I’m sure there were just as many nights that she, too, needed comforting. 

FROM MY MOM’S PERSPECTIVE

After I got engaged I began to think about my mom more. I anticipated my soon to be new role as a wife and all of the exciting things that would come along with that. I began to think about what it must have been like to be in my mother’s shoes nearly 30 years ago – anxiously waiting to marry my dad.

They had no idea at the time that only a few short years later they would be receiving a detrimental cancer diagnosis that would completely change their lives. Throughout the year of my engagement, and even almost one full year into my marriage, those thoughts still haunt me a bit. 

My mom and dad had no idea what was to come. If I were to ask my mom what she would do differently if she could go back to those blissful years pre cancer, I’m sure she would say hold on to every moment a little bit longer, cherish the mundane a little bit more, let go of all the small frustrations, and hug each other a bit tighter. 

I read a post on Facebook the other day that made me stop and think.

When you see your husband’s dirty clothes two feet from the hamper, just pick them up and toss them where they are supposed to be, it said, instead of complaining to him about how you’ve asked him many times to put them away. The open cabinets left out toothpaste, and unmade beds – though they are all frustrations that you could easily nag your spouse about, instead appreciate them. Those small annoyances mean that your spouse is present, and that’s something to be so thankful for. 

Many might read this post and scroll on by thinking, “what a sweet thought,” but never really consider that it could be their reality. Even with having lost my dad, many times I fall prey to this same thinking. Something was different as I read that post that afternoon though. I thought of my mom and how I am sure she would give anything to have one more day of picking up after my dad.

LESSONS LEARNED

Throughout every season of my life I’ve gained a different perspective on the death of my dad. This time of my life is no different. I hope these aren’t lessons I soon forget, but instead make it a priority to consider my mom every time I get frustrated at my husband and every time we disagree.

Though that’s not to say that we shouldn’t deal with things in our marriage, but instead to cherish the fact that we are together and can work through things by each other’s sides, holding to the covenant that we made to each other knowing that we are not promised tomorrow. 

So, though we can’t fully step into my mom’s shoes, I hope we all learn a lesson from her life. As I see her now sending off her children to college and watching them get married and have kids of their own, I’ve considered a lot more that I wasn’t the only one that must have walked through different seasons of mourning.

She filled her life with her 3 kids, she raised them up, sent them off and now she’s facing a new reality. When many parents are settling in for their retirement years to enjoy the quiet of just being together again, my mom is an empty nester on her own. While she would never want our pity, I can imagine she faces tougher days than she might ever let me in on. 

So from the strength, grace, vulnerability and joy of my mom I hope I have learned and continue to learn these lessons: 

  • Do not take our time here for granted. As Scripture says in Proverbs 27:1, we are not promised tomorrow. How should we live our lives differently, especially with those we love most, knowing that this is true? 
  • Love those around you and do not miss a moment to just soak up time together. 
  • When life gets tough, lean into the Father’s arms who has promised his presence in all seasons of life. 
  • Even when it’s not easy, take the next step. In the strength of the Lord, you will carry on. 

Tonight as I head home from work I’ll hug my husband for a few seconds longer. I’ll wash the dishes and thank the Lord for the gift of having my best friend to have a meal with. I’ll close the cabinets I’ve asked him to shut 10 times already with joy in my heart, because we can laugh at these little frustrating habits we both have and rejoice that we get to share a home together. For however long the Lord allows me to continue on this earth, I pray this new perspective will guide me.