December 7, 2019. This date has been on my heart for the past three years. Some would look at me and laugh when I told them why, others would tell me I was crazy. Some, however, would crack a smile and nod and understand why it meant so much to me.
On December 7, 1991 there was a wedding. A young girl powdered her face with makeup, and a young man tied his tie with butterflies in his stomach. Two families hurried around to pull together the final details. Flowers hung on the pews, the guests began to arrive, and soon the two would become one. These two people would be married, walk together, and have a family. They would serve the Lord and stand by each other’s side in sickness and in health. This day is one I cherish, because that beautiful bride was my mother and that handsome groom was my dad.
Every year when this day on the calendar comes around I can see the glimmer in my mom’s eye of a tear as she thinks about her groom, longing for the years together that they did not get to share. Though she walks with a soul at peace in the Lord’s perfect plan, her heart yearns for the one she loves. Every year on this day I wonder what would have been different about my life had both my parents been present. Though I grew up knowing the love my parents shared for each other, I only got to see that lived out for a short period. How I wish there would have been more! I craved the type of love that my parents had for one another. The kind that gripped each other’s hands and walked head on into a storm that would not soon end, all the way until my dad was called home. They loved each other as Christ calls one to love their spouse, and until death did them part they walked faithfully.
As most girls do, I’ve dreamt for years about my wedding day and about the one whom I would marry. For the past three years, before Brannon came into my life, I had this idea that if I were to get married on the same day that my parents promised themselves to each other, in some way, I would always share in the same love that my parents had for one another. I could honor the marriage that they had, and give thanks for how the Lord orchestrated their marriage so that the day I marry would one day follow. When Brannon came into my life, and I realized how badly I wanted him to be a part of my forever, I started to dream of this becoming a possibility, but never truly believing it might become reality. Brannon knew how special this day was to me, for more reasons than just the date itself. He grasped what it stood for, and how greatly my heart desired for my parents love and marriage to live on, be celebrated, and remembered as I made that vow in my own life. To not have someone presently with you has translated into my life as always trying to grasp onto something to make them seem as if they’re still in your midst. This was one of those things that I so badly wanted to grasp onto.
January 5, 2019. My family went to take pictures overlooking a beautiful mountain scene. I was truly oblivious to how my life would soon change in the next few minutes. As Brannon and I posed in front of the camera, I could hear his heart beat speed up. An anxious thought ran across my brain wondering, hoping. Soon enough, he turned and took my hands and knelt down on one knee. He began to speak sweet words to me about our relationship, and our future. He began to talk about my parents, my dad specifically, and how he knew that I wished so badly that he could be here for this day and season of our lives. Tears fell from my face as he explained to me that the ring he would soon put on my finger was more special than just a regular diamond ring from any jewelry store. The diamond that would sit at the center of my ring is not a diamond that Brannon picked out, but that my dad picked out almost 29 years ago to place on my mom’s left hand. Brannon had found the perfect setting for the diamond to sit in, and with the blessing of my mom, placed the diamond worn on her finger for many years onto mine. My soul within could not quite process the depth of the words that were coming from his mouth. And even now, a month later, how special these words are to me sinks in all over again.
All that I ever wanted in December 7th now sits on my left hand. My parent’s marriage always remembered, their love celebrated, and a piece of both my mom and my dad that I get to keep with me every day that I live. I’m reminded of the sovereignty and of the goodness of the Lord. He knew all those years ago that when my dad walked out of the jewelry store that the ring he picked out would not only last through his marriage, but carry on into my own. Every day when I look down at the shiny diamond on my left hand I can’t help but stand in awe of the faithfulness of God. He was faithful to my dad, to lead him and guide him and save his soul. He was faithful to my mom to love her and call her to himself. He was faithful to lead them to each other, bind them in marriage, and walk with them through the good and bad seasons. He has been faithful to carry my family through the dark days of losing my dad, and renewing our joy within as we saw His hand at work in our lives. He has been faithful to Brannon. To mold him, make him, and call him his own. And in a beautiful intertwining of stories, He was faithful to allow mine and Brannon’s paths to cross.
Though we won’t be getting married on December 7th of this year, I’m excited to begin our story on December 28th, 2019. And with this ring tightly held on my left hand, it will seem as if my dad is a little nearer as I walk down the aisle to the love of my life.
Remember + Rejoice 