I used to dread the topic of “my testimony.” Countless times as a middle-schooler I would tell my mom that I saw no need in sharing how I came to know the Lord, because I never felt there was a time in my life that I didn’t know Him. Even up until recently He has been reminding me of the VICTORY that He won in my life when He took my lifeless heart and breathed grace into it! All that I am today is a beautiful testimony of His goodness and faithfulness to me; once dead and lost, now redeemed and free!
It is true that there was never a time in my life that I did not “know” Jesus. This was just a head knowledge, however. I grew up in and around church (and how thankful I am for that!) My parents lived the Gospel at home, and taught us the truth of His Word! My church family was more than just a Sunday morning visit, but they were consistently and intently involved in my life from the time I was born up until now. I was raised on Alice in Bible Land books, VBS song motions, and Wednesday night kickball tournaments. I knew all the answers, how to say the best prayer, and every word to “I’ll Fly Away.” I KNEW God, but my heart was very far from Him. At some point I walked an aisle and said a prayer, and not that you cannot be in sincere in that because the Lord works in us all in different ways, but in my life there was no heart connection to my actions.
When I got into middle school, I began to experience a little bit of the “world” that I had never seen before. I learned that not everyone had the same church upbringing that I had. Because of my Bible raising, my mind was good at telling me right from wrong. When I chose to go along with the world, my conscious ate me alive. Sometimes it did not stop me, other times I might sit in the background but with a heart burning with great desire for the worldly ways that I was seeing around me. I struggled with craving acceptance from the world with my entire being. My heart and my mind were so fooled by the lies that I was being told. I was so distant from the Lord, and I had my sights on a very slippery, dangerous slope. During the Christmas break of my 7th grade year, I experienced relationship with the Lord for the first time at a youth conference called Connect. For so long I had “known” God, but during those few days in the mountains of Tennessee, I experienced God. I learned that it was more than a head knowledge that I needed, but that the God of the Universe wanted a personal and intimate relationship with me. He wanted me to walk with Him daily and grow in His grace and His love.
For the longest time I did not feel that this story was worth telling. How inspirational could it be if I was raised in the church, toyed with the world for a handful of seconds, and then was brought to the place of understanding the death of my sin and my need for Him. How many other people had the same story? Ive been through this in my head a thousand times over, but this past week the Lord reminded me once again of His Victory in my life and how POWERFUL it is and that is must be shared! I never came to a place that the world would consider “bad”. But what the world considers as good and what God considers good are two different things.
Romans 6:23a
For the wages of sin is death…
There is not a sin scale that determines good from bad, but it is all piled into the same bucket and considered death. I was dead. I was lost. I had no hope. BUT GOD.
Romans 6:23b
…but the gift of God is eternal life in Christ Jesus our Lord.
My life is a testimony of His greatness, because without him saving my soul I would be in a very, very dark place. When I think about where I could be today I am so overwhelmed and gratefulness for my God. When I sing praises to Him, when I desire to tell others about Him, when I spend the summer as a camp counselor, when I read my Bible, when I spend time in prayer, when I love on others it is not because I am good but because HE IS GOOD. None of this is me, none of this is of my self, none of this is where I was heading. I have no reason at all to boast because all that I am is from Him. I have no idea why He would choose to save me to use as His vessel on this earth, but He has- and that truth blows my mind.
I was driving down the road the other day when I began to consider all of this again. Tears rolled down my face as I prayed to Him “God, thank you!” Whatever your testimony consists of- whether you walked down the dark path or only had the heart and were heading in that direction. Whether you were raised in church or did not know the first word to Amazing Grace. We are all united in our total separation and hopelessness due to sin. BUT when Christ comes in He makes you white as snow and He takes what is dead and breathes into it LIFE. That sends chills down my back! He has given me hope, joy, and ABUNDANT life (John 10:10).
It is the victory that I have found in Christ that drives me forward each day. I pray that if you know Him as your savior, the same would be true for you. Let us walk in the light of the life that we have in HIM ALONE. Let it change the way we think, the way we act, the things we do, and the people we love. He bought you with His blood, so WALK FROM THAT VICTORY!!
Titus 3:3-7
For we ourselves were once foolish, disobedient, led astray, slaves to various passions and pleasures, passing our days in malice and envy, hated by others and hating one another. But when the goodness and loving kindness of God our Savior appeared, he saved us, not because of works done by us in righteousness, but according to his own mercy, by the washing of regeneration and renewal of the Holy Spirit, whom he poured out on us richly though Jesus Christ our Savior, so that being justified by his grace we might become heirs according to the hope of eternal life.
It is so easy to claim Christ. It is in our Instagram bios, plastered on our Facebook walls, and maybe even the background of our phones. So many people are claiming Christ. We are not called to just claim Him. He has saved us, redeemed us, given us new life so that we can not only claim Him, but also PROCLAIM Him. It is so easy to go along with the ways of this world and wear Jesus on your sleeve, I am guilty of this as well. But we have to be constantly reminded of the name that we are carrying around. How are you representing Christ? Don’t stop at claiming Him. If you are going to claim His death, His resurrection, and His salvation work in your life- proclaim it to the nations!
Our testimonies don’t end after we “ask Jesus into our hearts.” Our testimonies continue to be written every single day that we are given. This was laid on my heart a couple weeks ago and I wrote the following in response. Running our race for Jesus and living a sold out life for Him is not easy, but as I said before- it is HIS VICTORY that drives us on! It is not in ourselves, in our strength, in our ability.
On a hilly terrain lined with trees and brush, the race isn’t always easily run. Rocks trip us up, limbs crowd our view, and our breath runs short. We are to run our race with eyes fixed on the finish line, but that’s not easily done when all we see ahead is the next mound we must climb. Sweat drips from our brow and doubts cloud our thoughts. Is our sight set in the wrong direction? What if instead of focusing solely on the dirt underneath our feet and the pain in our lungs, we fixed our eyes above? Though leaves may block our view, as we continue on our journey forward glimmers of light break through upward. What if in that moment instead of growing weary by the miles left to run, we reminded ourselves why we are running in the first place; remind ourselves of the one that is unchanging and constant? The race might take us through different scenery where He is seen sometimes more, sometimes less, like valleys and mountains, but that doesn’t alter His presence. It is in those places where He is harder to see that our eyes for Him grow stronger. We must not question why we are where we are; for His understanding is unsearchable. We must fix our eyes on those glimmers of light and train our souls to fight and to run not because we can, but because He already did.
Walk from VICTORY brothers and sisters.
Father,
Thank you for my salvation! Thank you for the life that I get to live because of your son! I cannot praise your name enough, Jesus! I would be in such a scary place had you not stepped into the picture. You are so good to me. God, I pray that all that I do would point back to you, that I would be your vessel here and proclaim you with my life and walk in victory every day.
I love you.
Love, Em
Remember + Rejoice 